Sports
(Pick-Up) Football: WOUB decimates “The Post” in Sunday battle
By: Steve Uhlmann
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After weeks of exchanging smack talk and formal letters, it took only 54 minutes for the WOUB Sports staff to dismantle The Post by a score of 10-1 at the Peden Stadium Practice Field Sunday afternoon.
Fueled by a large number of turnovers, the senior-laden squad showed why it is the superior athletic media outlet in front of an estimated crowd of 25.
The Post had few viable quarterback options in the contest, as the newspapers’ pass-heavers threw eight interceptions in the shellacking.
Sophomore Graham Fugazzi, the only underclassman on the WOUB squad, opened the scoring with a lengthy interception return to make it 1-0. He would add three touchdowns on offense and another interception return to lead the team with five scores.
The multimedia news outlet only allowed three first downs in the entire game, which lasted barely longer than an episode of The Bobcat Sports Showcase (which airs Friday nights at 11 p.m. on WOUB-TV, for the record).
After quarterback Grant Burkhardt found pass catching machine Matt Archibald in the end zone to make it 2-0, The Post scored its only touchdown of the game. From there, WOUB took over. The news station, led behind the scenes by former E.W. Scripps journalism school director Tom Hodson, scored eight unanswered touchdowns.
In the post-game fallout, Hodson responded with the simple phrase, “I am so proud.”
Gridiron Glory host Blake Brodie, Gridiron director Jason Chiappino and general WOUB roamer Rob Guliano got into the act on defense, as all three recorded an interception against the Post's putrid offensive attack.
Senior television producer Tanner Smith returned another interception for a touchdown, and lineman Frank Bumb hauled in another score. Those two plays added insult to injury late in the contest.
Burkhardt took advantage of the complete lack of a pass rush by The Post to throw for seven touchdowns while spreading the ball around the field with ease.
“I think I’m ready to go workout now,” he said afterward. “It was too easy.”
After the hype leading up to the game, the WOUB players were disappointed by the lackluster play of their opponents.
“I don’t want to play [The Post] again,” defensive specialist Rob Guliano said. “I would like to play some competitive football.”
WOUB said it wants to show its superiority in the remaining weekends of the quarter against anyone willing to give it a competitive game. The Post will be looking to get back on the winning track against much more suitable opposition, including the likes of AVW Productions, Ohio Sports Zone, Thread Magazine and College Green Magazine.
As part of the wager on this game, this article appeared in The Post on Oct. 30, 2011