My Bipolar Journey and Making the Conversation Easier
By: Emily Squance
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ATHENS, Ohio – Mental illness has no preference to size, race, or even gender. Unfortunately, many people struggle with their mental health in silence. In more recent years, it has become a comfortable topic for some, but oftentimes there is still a stigma associated with it.
Background
Growing up, I never had any personal experience with mental illness (or so I thought). I struggled with some anxiety in high school, but I quickly managed it with proper coping mechanisms. I was thankful to have a family that encouraged me to talk about my mental health instead of keeping it inside. My grandma, in particular, was someone I felt very comfortable around. I admired her ability always to look her best despite what our family might have been going through.
Until her passing, I was unfamiliar with bipolar disorder and how it affected my family. I didn’t realize my grandma had been struggling with it her whole life. She was in a constant battle with her mind – but never let it show.
The Beginning
A couple of years went by after my grandma’s passing, and it was time to start the next chapter of my life at Ohio University. When I first came to Athens, I loved every second of it. I made many friends and felt like I was finally starting to find my place in the world. However, as my time at Ohio University progressed, I noticed a change in my mental health.
Towards the end of my sophomore year, and beginning of junior year, I started to feel restless and not like myself. I would go through periods where I would have a lot of energy: be fine one minute, and then cry the next. I tried to talk to my friends about these feelings, but they never seemed to understand.
The Diagnosis
With the help of a psychiatrist, I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder. Together we came to realize that online therapy could be beneficial. Unfortunately, finding a good therapist that I connected with proved to be challenging. Thankfully, after a long search, I was able to find one that I still see today.
With the help of my therapist, I’ve been able to manage my symptoms easily. In addition, I’m thankful for my mom
and her knowledge of the disorder because, together, we’ve been able to format a plan for my future.
Not every day will be a good day, and not every day will be a bad one. However, I feel like I finally have the tools to recognize the signs of an episode early on. I hope to build a support system with this and inspire others to normalize the conversation about mental health.